Being Bostonian

I moved to Boston nearly couple years ago. I have lived the Midwest culture, experienced the west coast life now trying to be a Nor' easter. And I must say.. there is no greater joy like living in Boston and being a true Bostonian. But.. you have to prepare for that!

As soon as I moved to Boston, I felt closer to my home country when I was driving. People honk, that is a means of communication telling the other person to yield, just like in India. You have to be aggressive on roads.. this is how you clear the prelims of being Bostonian. Other things are add-ons. You can honk on turns just to be safe if anyone is coming from the opposite direction. You do not have to show respect to pedestrians as they are not supposed to stop you from driving. (“rastyat sarvat durlakshit goshta mhanje padachaari”). There is no lane system on the roads. Two lanes can change into one or three without any indication. But there is an unwritten code of conduct between every driver. You have to master that to be a Bostonian. If two cars can be accommodated alongside each other (on an internal road, or a freeway ramp/exit), no one cares about how many lanes are there. Organically traffic keeps on flowing making optimum use of the space. And esp in peak hours, people calmly keep flowing as and where they find space. Until there is a “road romeo” who tries to cut through and merge in between a lane to save time/ go faster. That’s when Bostonians unite to make sure he cannot cut through their lane. It’s a matter of Bostonian pride now. That time you’ll hear honks and see fingers flipped at our road romeo. Most of the times, this road romeo is someone from outside Boston or new to Boston ..or from New York. Being Bostonian on the roads is not about following traffic rules, it’s about utilizing space and time optimally so that everyone can reach their respective offices on time (and then bitch about how bad the traffic is getting these days …:aaj kal chi pora na.. “).

A true Bostonian will hate New York, or a New Yorker. A true Bostonian cop will ticket almost every NY license plate seen on Boston roads (and from a personal experience, vice versa is also true :/). It’s much like how a true Punekar feels about a Mumbaikar or living in Mumbai and vice versa. You need pride in being a Bostonian. Bostonian honyasathi abhimanachi garaj aste. (jajwalya abhimaan nai.. to punyakadech ahe ajun). And unlike Pune, where pride can to be of anything and everything, here the pride has to be about the Patriots, and Red Socks (Tom Brady and beards). And when it comes to Red Socks v/s Yankees, nothing can get better than that.

(image from google)

Unlike in Bay Area, where most of the people are migrated from outside, in Boston, you can see people living here for generations. People are family oriented, live with families, together. People are very friendly at work and outside. Not to say there is huge population of students here (due to world class universities like MIT and Harvard), but there is also a huge populace of people living in this area for decades. These people know every gali nukkad of the area. They would not use google maps to “show” you how to get to a certain place, but will tell landmarks, names of streets, restaurants that you would come across as you navigate. It’s similar when you ask you grandmother how to go from shanipar to nagnathpar (google gets confused here but not your grandma). You as a newbie, you would require a personal guidance initially. Google need not rescue you every time. (And yes, its a feeling of achievement and self pride when you are able to navigate in Boston without using a GPS. You are tuning into a Bostonian)

And when it comes to snow…!

Boston gets a lot of snow. A lot! So much that there is no place to pile it up or dump it. This time, being Bostonian is about writing at least one article in a local newspaper (every other weeks) expressing how the govt sucks and does not take any measures to remove snow.

Boston does not have a luxury to have garage spaces for everyone and hence people park on streets. This is where it becomes interesting when it snows. Streets reduce to half there widths and the “spot fight” starts. Being Bostonian in winter is to get creative in your “space savers” A “space saver” is something that you keep on street to “reserve” your so called parking spot. It can be anything, a chair, a ladder, a tire, a discarded computer, a hand glove.. anything. Well, by law, parking on streets is not allocated. Anyone can park anywhere on the street where parking is permitted. But, now you dare to move this “space saver” and park your car in someone else’s “spot” and you cannot guarantee the well-being of your vehicle anymore. Windshield could be trashed, tires may be flat, windows could be broken with snow on all the seats. People can get much more creative. Oh.. and cops.. they have given up in tracking people who put space savers and ticketing them. They have better things to do.

(images taken from google)

 But, being Bostonian means respecting a space saver and not parking your car there. It’s an unwritten rule. A true Bostonian knows the effort one has put up in digging his car out, and he would never go and park in his spot if there is a space saver there. (True reason is he loves his vehicle and is aware of the consequences: P). Still some people clarify the consequences like below

People are very patient in winter. If a car is stuck in snow, some do get out of their own and help push the stuck car. The honking percent goes down. On single lane roads people wait patiently for the oncoming traffic to pass or effectively navigate around them if space permits. Bostonians face winter in a united fashion. The most agitated people in winter are the plough guys though. The people who plough the roads. I guess their boredom in ploughing in this cold winter when everyone “works from home” is reflected from the aggressive driving they do when ploughing. If you are on an internal single lane street and a plough truck comes in front of you, don’t even try to navigate from around it, just back up all the way and let him go!!

To all those Punekar’s… just be like those oaks and leles from sadashiv peth, and it’s not very difficult to be a true Bostonian thereafter.

(This article is not written to insult anyone and is a work of fiction… Boston chya snow madhle sanskar ahet amche!)

Visiting hometown at 27!

It was after two years that I planned a trip to Pune for a month. I visited home for almost a month beginning from the New Year’s. I was super excited to see family after such a long time. The feeling was mutual. Mom, dad, grandparents, cousins everyone had planned variety of things for welcoming me.

One thing that slipped out of my mind which family never forgets, that I was returning at an age of 27!! Well for an Indian guy.. this is THE age. You know what I am getting into. You just have to look at your facebook wall and every other day one of your pals leaves the bachelor cult and puts a ring into someone’s finger! You can pretend to overlook this but your family won’t. Esp now, when even your parents are on facebook, you do not have any excuse.

So from the very first day people started indirectly asking me about my plans, about the girl. I tried to dodge the questions but couldn’t hold the fort for too long. It was the moment when my maternal uncle/ aunt asked me point blank.. “Dude.. it’s the age.. when are you getting married”. I had no answer! Grandparents added to the fire.. “We are ok with anyone, need not be Marathi, or Indian for that matter (haaw… ajobanche vichar pudharlele ahet). Just tell me if you have anyone in mind, or should we start searching for a match”. Then mom gave a bummer that her friends had already given patrikas of a couple girls for a potential match. Oh my God.. this means even the people from my housing society know that I am of THAT age. (Yeah.. In india.. if you don’t take any steps at the right age.. your family and even the society will put all their efforts in the ‘right’ direction. Jab saari kayanat use milane mein jud jaati hai.. that’s what we call as “arranged marriage”).

I don’t know how to answer these questions? You talk about not dating anyone, they will pull their contacts to find a match. You talk about career, they will tell you how your dad managed it after marriage when he was of your age. You talk about “not being mentally ready for this next step”, they will tell how everything falls in place after marriage. So basically.. they have all the strength to put the ball back into your court until you concede.

It was a fun experience. I am still not engaged or married and I am back to the US. So.. I can now postpone all such talk until next year. But probably I should do my homework before facing my family again! :) 

(image from google)

The land of MIT and Harvard

It’s been close to three months that I relocated to Boston to explore a different job opportunity and this city is already doing great in giving me all sorts of life experiences. I have spent couple years in Midwest (Michigan), couple on the west coast (Silicon Valley) and now it’s the time for east coast adventures in the city of MIT and Harvard.

I moved to Boston in summer so the transition to the coming horrible winter after a sunny honeymoon in California will be smooth. So I am good on that front. But I was then used to Californian style of driving! Now I have become an aggressive driver to adapt to the Bostonians! Here the state road infrastructure is radial (Boston being the center) and not a simple grid as in the west. This means more curvy roads, more randomness and hence more excitement in driving without a GPS. For the person who loves driving, Boston is the place. Further there are many potholes, thanks to snow. I sometimes feel that development of the west is like “learning from mistakes” of the east. Here you honk to express your anger (and you get angry quite often), you do not wait for pedestrians if they are about to cross. Lane width is smaller, many places there are no lanes and you have to use your Indian judgment to drive through. Some places, four lanes merge into two without any prior indication and hence you need to be alert and ready for traffic congestion. And most importantly.. too many women drivers here!!!

Am getting used to this now. My colleague from Tesla (who was in Boston for last few years) had told me to be prepared for at least one dent in the beginning couple months in Boston! .. well he was right! J

Now that I am living here (and not a tourist as I was a couple years back), I get to see many aspects of Bostonian lifestyle. People are more welcoming here. They are social and more family oriented that the west coast counterparts. They are more attached to the American history. I see people from various backgrounds like engineering, medical, advocacy, economics, social service etc etc (and not only Indian software engineers). I like this variety. I can see many more people who are staying in this area for multiple generations so they have their own quirks. (Unlike in California, where you rarely see any core Californian). To give an appealing example is how a core Puneri will behave in Pune! (dukanat sarvat durlakshya karnyasarkhi goshta mhanje girahik) ;)

I live in a big 7 bedroom house with seven random people. We share the kitchen. New people come and go and bring a different lifestyle with them. Currently there is on guy from Saudi Arabia, one from Iran, US, India, Czech Republic etc. These are engineers, economists, founders of startups, serial entrepreneurs, media journalists, academicians. I feel really fortunate to experience the interaction with them. There is so much to learn beyond if, for and while loops which I code daily. My friend from Iran has travelled a lot. He shares tons of stories from various nations like in EU, Aus, Middle East etc. The journalist is up to date with all the current affairs throughout the world. I can discuss my current Indian economic situation with the economist in the house.

The area is surrounded with schools like MIT, Harvard, Tufts (Fletcher), North Eastern universities. Great talent of students in the areas of technology, science, business, medical etc is around. (well pan punyat rahun shanivar wada ajun pahila nahi.. ase hi loka astat! ). Boston has too many things to offer. I participated in a midnight bike (cycle) ride around Boston. This was a 30ish mile ride from 12am- 7am finishing on an island with the sun rising in front of us. It was just amazing to ride at night, visit places that you will never go on a bike, see some bike tricks, give high fives to drunk girls on the road at the time when bars start to close, see the people who honk in a rhythm to cheer a crazy group of 50 riding at 3am in midnight. People are enough crazy to do weird things. There was one guy who rode most of the miles just on his rear wheel. There was one person who had speakers, music and disco lights on this bike. Riding besides his was fun!! 

Samuel Adams come from Boston. The brewery here offers a free tour and totally free bear tasting.. how about that!! There is something called as a "freedom trail". It is a bricked path from the heart of the city which pretty much goes through all the important historical landmarks that the city has to offer. The more interesting part is that there is a series of couple minute audio files about each location on the web that you can download on your cell phone and do the entire trail by yourself. This is a best way to get closer to the city, get to know what the city has to offer you. I am very impressed by this idea to promote tourism and American history and culture. Walking, biking and using the "T" has brought be closer to the city.

I am not sure how lively the city will be during the white months. But, there is still some time for that. Before that, after almost two long years, I will be experiencing something that no one in California can ever experience!! :)

A weather change from summer to fall!  Looking forward for fall!

Office Office!!

It was the day when I got my first ticket.. a parking violation.. and I realized that even this leading economy, a so called perfect country to live, is not that perfect at all. The difference being.. here corruption is coded into rules.. so it is “by the book!”

A few days back when my car was parked off street, I saw an envelope on the windshield. I guess it right.. it was a ticket. It mentioned I had to pay $53 for not displaying right registration sticker on my license plate. Here it is called a 5402 violation. The envelop mentioned that that under correctable violation section (4000a) if I provided a proof of correction within 21 days then my fine will be reduced to $10. Well..I was happy.. Thought it’s not that bad! :) So the next day I corrected it by sticking an updated tag on the plate.

After correcting my violation, proudly, I went to the Sunnyvale police station to get a sign of an officer as a proof of my correction. (The ticket was issued by City of Sunnyvale). I was surprised to learn that in a police station here, I have to speak over a phone to the officer who is standing few meters away from me with a bullet proof glass in between!! Well, police station should be supposedly the safest place in the city right! :P. Anyways, so I told him the story and asked him if he can sign off my ticket. He smiled, said "yes" and then pointed me to a notice which said I will have to pay $41 for an officer to walk to my car, check the plate and then sign off. So, for a $53 ticket, which would then (probably) reduce to $10, I will have to pay $41 to get it signed!! Wow!.. and it’s not wrong huh.. it’s written in the rules! :-/

Then he himself suggested me that I can ask around at other places (he did not know where) where I can get it signed for free. So I called up Mountain view police station.. $25 for people not living in Mountain view (free for residents). Thinking on the same lines that I am a resident of Santa Clara, I went to Santa Clara police station.. $11 no matter where you stay! :D .. God.. yahan bhi log lootne ko baithe hai. I can catch a cop on a road and ask him for his sign (probably when he is at Starbucks).. but interrupting a cop on duty.. could be another ticket. So these guys tell you alternatives and then tell you how that alternative is not possible :P. Then I visited San Jose police station.. where finally I got it signed for free. !! The adventure does not end here…

I asked the same officer to confirm that now I had to pay only $10. He had no clue why in first place the ticket issued was of $53. According to him it should have been much less. So again.. now I had to go to Sunnyvale police station to clarify what I had to pay. The same officer at Sunnyvale saw the ticket and said that the fine will not be reduced as it is a 5402 violation and the ticket mentions correctable violation (section 4000a). Well..  4000a means not registering the car at all. So I asked him that not registering the car should be a more serious violation than not displaying the correct sticker right? Then how come that is correctable and mine is not!! His answer was.. “it’s not what we think, it’s what written in the rules”!! :D :D

So then, I did some internet browsing and found that my violation was correctable. I went there again and told him that the website mentions 5204 is correctable. His response “well, the website may mention it is correctable, but that does not mean your fine will be reduced, it only means you can correct it!” …now I had started losing my calm!! I asked him where I can confirm this.. and he said “We  do not handle payments here.. we do not know”.!  I called up the citation processing center (place where I had to submit my payment) and they told me I had to pay only $10 after getting the proof of correction. So I had both answers.. and no way to confirm what I  should be actually doing.

Sunnyvale court is next door. I had read on the internet that I can pay off the tickets at the court,  so I stopped by. I asked the officer there about the ticket, and he directed me to the police station for parking violation inquiries….. Now I am stuck in an infinite loop!! (and I can’t inquire anywhere else as the ticket is issued by Sunnyvale.. so other places won’t have any clue). Bhai SAB TV par Office Office  lagta that bachpan  me.. uske jaise halat hui hai!!

Speaking with my friends I heard few more such instances. A moving violation (like speeding etc.. which is safety related and more  serious, which accumulates points on your license) can be “converted” to a parking violation by paying the lawyer double the amount of the ticket. Any ticket can be “settled out of the court” by paying the officer some amount that you negotiate. All the officer does is tells the judge he does not want to press charges. Well.. all this “lobbying”, “off court settlement”, “converting moving violation into parking” is perfectly fine as it might have been written somewhere!!!

Seriously!! What is the point in blaming our police officers, blaming our system? Bus hum illegally karte hai isliye?? Ya khule aam dikh jaata hai isliye? Log itne jyada hai.. to obviously such instances will be more evident right? Point is.. it’s everywhere and it is wrong.. We should be proud that at least our government does not legally permit these kinds of things (probably?)!!

Don’t know how much I am going to pay for this ticket! :)

The Cultural Difference

After grad life, now working in a company most of time with Americans, staying with an American family, using public transport daily has brought me more close to the American culture, the western way of thinking. There are still many things to imbibe, but some cultural differences between us and these western people are prominent.

Independence, thanks to technology, is what is seen in every American. And now I realize it has many shades. Every person, be a man or a woman, a kid or an old one, a fit or a disabled, can live his entire life on his own. Buses have ramps for disabled to get in, traffic light ped crossings have radio records for blind to help cross, every house has a garage and tools to fix their own vehicle, and internet is everywhere; these people hardly feel a need to interact. Every person has an i-gadget in his ear, a kindle in his hands and a smart phone with data plan activated. They hardly care to come out of their world.

Good thing is you are independent. You don't need anyone to help you do your daily chores. You are free. No one would care if you do stupid dancing on roads or if you kiss your girlfriend at the train station. You don't need to ask around if you are lost, you will have a GPS or an i-phone to see directions. But.. it disconnects people. This disconnects families. A father thinks his son has to leave his house when he is 16 as he thinks "his mother still feeds his a** and after he leaves my house I would spend that money to buy a Porsche" And a kid thinks "I don't have to stay with them, I earn, I have money, and a girlfriend, I can afford to rent a place. So why should I rely on them!" As a result, kids stay with their girlfriend(s), and old people are transferred to old age homes. But there is no regret as nothing changes in their lives, they have all the tools to live their life independently and happily (?).

In contrast, we have grown in a culture where we stay together. We are emotionally attached and kids feel a sense of responsibility towards their parents. The culture in which we are brought up, we tend to take care of our parents when they grow old. When I communicated these thoughts with a fellow American, he was surprised, and felt great about the culture in which people are brought up a few thousand miles far.

I am surprised when I see that every American can fix his car in his house, and does not have to go to a garage. Come to think of it, it’s due to high labor charges here. If they quote me $50 to fix brakes on my $80 bike, I would refer to google and fix it myself. On the other hand, I will easily give Rs5 to a Puncturewala in Pune and get my punctured tire fixed. These guys are surprised when I tell them we have a doodhwala that brings us milk every morning, we have a maid that daily comes and cleans the house and even when I tell that we get the newspaper in hardcopy. They are used to read e-versions.

Within a family everything is "ours" in India whereas here, its "mine" or "yours". The other day I was talking to a collogue during lunch and said "in my house back in India.....". He was surprised and asked me if I owned a house! People here always distinguish between "my house" and "my dad's house". Similarly, within a house, its "my car" and "my dad's car" where as in India its "our car". These people respect privacy to such an extent that my landlady asks her mom for permission to use her car, or to put a couple of her clothes in a washing machine with her mom's.

There are so many more things. But the bottom line is, is it solely the technology and infrastructure that has facilitated this upbringing? With technological advances in India, will we see an Americanized India in a few decades? I hope we consciously imbibe all the positive aspects of technological advances, keeping our emotional attachment, and our strong cultural values intact.

The Midwest and the Valley

It was a leap from Midwest to West. After two fun filled years at Michigan, it’s now time to experience what they call as the valley of startups aka Silicon Valley.

I joined Tesla Motors which is located in the heart of Silicon Valley, Palo Alto, very next to Stanford University. California is a huge state, but Silicon Valley spans from I guess San Jose to San Francisco and it is altogether different than The Auto State: Michigan!

They have their own standings. Where the Big 3 rule (GM, Ford, Chrysler) in Michigan, they are nonexistent here in the valley. Here it’s all about Google, Apple and Facebook. In Michigan every person has to have a Ford (F150 is favorite amongst teens! :P..mereko abhi tak nahi samjha kyu?!) whereas here.. every person has to have a i-gadget. Here you will see all Hondas and

Toyotas unlike GMs and Fords in Michigan. Some people say that here there are more young and educated people that don’t blindly go for American models.. but cmon.. Sikkim la bakarwadi milnara dukan kasa milel! :P. Big 3 has a dominance on their home ground. They have created living for millions of people for over more than half a century! (and also ‘politically’ made sure that no public transport will ever bud in Michigan).

I saw apartments in California! Seriously! This is worth mentioning. Two long years after I saw apartments having parking below, tube lights in the parking, small children playing with their tri-cycles, grandparents sitting on benches and couples going for a post dinner walk. You know what I am saying. Nothing else in US can get more close to India. There is this road called El Camino Real, can be portrayed analogous to Karve road in Pune or ‘main road’ in any other city. This El Camino has shops on both sides. Right from groceries, restaurants, salons…. To Gadgil Jewelers!!! Awraaa! Chitale bandhu ch yayche rahilet.. rather te pan astil kuthetari!

Bike! Valley is very green, eco friendly. People use public transport, people bike to work. There are bike lanes on majority of the roads. Companies have monetary incentives for people who will not drive their car to work. This is not the story in Michigan. Firstly, the distances up there are huge.. you just cannot bike from your home to your work place. People drive for nearly half hour daily to reach their office in Michigan.. One cannot imagine anyone “wasting” so much time here! Secondly, you cannot bike when its below 0F!!

Michigan is more laid back. No startup culture. Whereas here its all about a budding idea and fast paced efforts for its implementation. I am amazed seeing the enthusiasm people here have. Everyone is bubbling with ideas, willing to help, willing to sponsor, willing to guide. People are young and so are the companies. The enthusiasm for innovation is spectacular which I doubt could be experienced in the Midwest. And hence there is not a person who will, after listening to your idea, say.. “40 saal se kaam kar raha hu.. nahi ho sakta ye! Time waste mat kar!”

California is a different ball game, and I am all excited to play this neatly! :)